Many relationships could be saved if people used better tools to communicate. If the tools you’ve been using to communicate with your partner aren’t working, try using the communication tools listed below. They may not be easy, but they’re simple, and the effects could greatly improve the quality of your relationship.
It’s challenging for someone that loves you to remain angry when you’re tenderly touching them in a way they love. One of the best times to lovingly touch your partner is when you’re about to discuss a topic that could potentially result in an argument. It’s more difficult to do so if the argument has already begun and you also are angry. Loving, physical touch can be a deterrent from arguing and according to Medicalnewstoday.com, it
can produce more of oxytocin, “the love hormone”, resulting in one feeling less stressed, less anxious, and more relaxed.
In today’s society, technology can be an effective tool for communication. But like any tool, it can be misused. It’s difficult to give your partner your undivided attention if you’re distracted by a screen. It’s also easy for your partner to feel you aren’t paying attention. Communication isn’t limited to the exchanging of words. Communication also includes facial expressions., i,e, nonverbal communication. Nonverbal communication is just as important as other forms of communication. Nonverbal communication like eye contact, facial expressions, gestures, body language, and posture could all be missed if you or your partner constantly stare at a screen. When you’re speaking to one another, remember to turn your attention away from any electronic devices with a screen and give your undivided attention. Also, try keeping your phones in your pockets/purses or on the side of the table, facing down when you’re out on dates.
Technology can be a useful tool for communication in some cases. Sending flirty or funny texts that make your partner feel special lets them know they’re on your mind. Schedule at-home date nights to watch movies/shows that you both enjoy. During the times you simply want to wind down, invite your partner to join you to watch your favorite shows. As simple as this invitation may be, sometimes it’s the simplest gestures that make our partners feel that we still desire them.
POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS & REMINDERS
During the beginning of relationships, love can feel new, exciting, and so beautiful. But after some years, you may start to see things you didn’t notice before-or maybe you did notice them, but they weren’t as pronounced. It could be your partner not taking care of their health, your partner asking where something is, without bothering to look for it first, snoring, or loud chewing. Some of these may sound ridiculous or even funny to some, but over time, a pattern of these behaviors could drive you insane and make you begin disliking your partner.
The amazing, beautiful things that made you fall in love are still there, you just have to intentionally remember them and not allow those annoying little things to cloud your view.
Every few days, write down a few things about your partner that you are grateful for. After a month, show it to him/her. This practice of affirmation will keep positive thoughts of your partner at the forefront of your mind and make your partner feel appreciated. As a result, your partner could feel encouraged & motivated to do more of what you like. It’s a win for everyone!
Reaffirm your relationship during the conflict, by making statements such as “ I’m really upset with you, but I still love you, and I’m not leaving. This affirmation will subconsciously be a mental reminder for you and give reassurance to your partner.
Make a conscious effort to not go ranting on your partner when he/she upsets you. It’s so easy to fall in the routine of complaining and venting about your partner to your friends and close family. Not only is that a bad look on your partner, but it’s a bad look for you. At some point, your listeners may start thinking “If he/she is so unhappy, why is he/she still with him/her?” Some of this news of your venting could even travel back to your partner, which could cause arguments. Rather than making it a habit of constantly sharing your partner’s faults, share their positive attributes.
Make a conscious effort to not go ranting on your partner when he/she upsets you. It’s easy to fall in the routine of complaining and venting about your partner to your friends and close family. Not only is that a bad look on your partner, but it’s a bad look for you. At some point, your listeners may start thinking “If he/she is so unhappy, why is he/she still with him/her?” Some of this news of your venting could even travel back to your partner, which could cause arguments. Rather than making it a habit of constantly sharing your partner’s faults, share their positive attributes.
If you feel you’ve tried multiple alternatives, but haven’t noticed any positive, long-lasting effects, or if you’re at the point where you feel you must release frustration from your relationship, it’s time to speak with a professional.
At CWC Coaching, our team consists of licensed therapists, life coaches, and counselors. We assist clients with self-improvement, career development, negative self-talk, psychological pain, self-sabotaging behavior, past hurts and finding your purpose. If you are ready to increase your self-awareness and happiness, breakthrough limiting behavior and understand your purpose in life, we’d love to help guide you on this journey.